If The Oscars Had Swag Bags For WNY Moms

The Oscar swag bag is notoriously famous, jammed with over $100,000 of goodies for Oscar attendees.

USA Today reports this year's bags include some crazy luxury items, such as:

• A trip to the Galapagos, the Amazon, Iceland or Costa Rica and Panama, complete with spa treatments and cooking lessons from International Expeditions.
• $30,000 toward chemical peels, laser skin resurfacing, injectables/fillers, Botox and other rejuvenation procedures from facial plastic surgeon Konstantin Vasyukevich.
• Absinthe from A. Junod.
• Mister Poop Emoji Plunger

Now, let's get a little more real here. What would a WNY mom want in a swag bag?

• A trip to Target without children, and no one questioning how much I've spent.
• $30K in spa treatments would be amazing, but I'm cool with some decent moisturizer.
• No need for the fancy Absinthe, just stick a few boxes of wine in there and we're good.
• Yes, let's include the Mister Poop plunger because as far as plungers go, it's adorable.
• Snacks. All the snacks.
• Noise cancelling headphones to be able to tune either the kiddos (or their music) out at will.
• Extra iPhone, so I can stop sharing mine with my kids.
• Ted's golden keychain (buy one get one weiners?! Yes please!)